through the storm and waves..

Mongolia is fine. It's peaceful here. we just went through the Nadaam festival where they do wrestling n' archery n' horseback racing. Yesterday, saturday, was awesome. we went to the mongolian countryside and rode mongolian horses. yes, they're smaller n' quite fast. they just told us to sit on a horse, gave us the reins, and then, well, let us control the horse. really scary and quite fun.

on other news, one of my students accepted Christ when i told her the Gospel. It was crazy good. God was working wonders through her n' i'll follow up on monday. i also found out two other of my students have accepted Christ and i'm now working towards equipping/discipling them.

God has been teaching me a lot about humility lately. I'm starting to see how sinful I am and how much I pretend to be alright before other people. What's most challenging is that my time is not my own. That is, sleep time is guarded, time with students is guarded, etc. I rarely have time for myself and to do my own things. It's been difficult submitting under leadership and doing what is asked of me when i don't agree.

But all in all, I'm still learning to grow. And the fact that i'm being challenged and disciplined is a testament of God's grace and goodness in working. I pray that, though this is a tough time n' pharmacy school has been giving me many problems about starting, I know God will work things out for good in the end because he promises in Jer 29:11. So long as I am in the center of God's will, I have nothing to worry about.

If you guys are reading this, please pray for God to work his will. That though the storm and waves are coming up at home (pharmacy school wants me to do a lot of things, deadlines are being pushed earlier, and a lot of minor decisions), that I trust that God means good to me. I believe he has called me here, just has he has called me to go to pharmacy school. May I not waver in unbelief but continue to whole heartedly do the work that God has called me to do.

Mongolia hairtai! -(i love mongolia)-UPDATE #2

In mongolia, things have been very interesting. Our class of students is now at 26. Many of them have heard the Gospel but very few understand what it means to follow Christ. So far, we have been spending much time with the students and loving them with Jesus's love.

Some girls have already expressed interest in joining a Bible study that we will start next week. It's very exciting and totally by God's grace.

In addition, some other fun news is that I partially dislocated my knee. I'm fine but when I was playing basketball with the students, I tripped and fell. My knee is back in its socket but still swollen for the last 3 days. I can walk and am absolutely fine. The students help me a lot. lol.

With the injury, I think I experienced a lot of learning how to rely on others. For the first day, people had to help me walk down stairs (our classroom is up two flights, down one, across a long hallway, and then down a couple more stairs). God has taught me a lot about learning how to be weak before him (both physically and emotionally). Especially today, I broke down crying because I was so tired of trying to do things on my own. Yet God is so good and he continues to forgive my mishaps and pour grace over and over.

We are desperately praying for chances to share Christ's love. I hope to do it in a gentle but also deliberate way. There is so much of a need for Jesus here in Mongolia. So please pray for opportunities for us to be able to share about Jesus as well as for health.

now that we're here

i can't believe it. I'm in mongolia. and traveled through much of china in 2 days.

God is crazy crazy (i've been saying this a lot) in the way that he works. I am so blessed to be here.

even after 4 hours here. i love mongolia. the land is beautiful. the culture is deep. and the people... the people have such a need of Christ. There is no question towards why i am here in mongolia.

God has been crazy good in keeping us safe through the 14 hour plane ride, the 12 hour bus ride, and the 14 hour train ride. it was unconventional but worth it.

i wouldn't trade that team bonding time for anything.

at the same time, God gave me time to prep my heart for this trip. i think i'm ready to pour out in love. but irregardless.... some prayer reqs...

1) to keep my heart focused on the mission.
MASTER. MISSION. MATE. right? i follow Christ and then, my focus is on the mission (i.e. to spread the gospel to the college students that we will be teaching english to). pray for undistracted time. especially as we women will be working closely with brothers. (you past VSET-ers know what i mean, right?). so prayer for a whole heart devoted to portraying the love of Christ.

2) continued prayer for Mongolia.
this is a country of secularism and political corruption. prayer to go out for the young people who grow up secular. that hearts will be soft and type 4 to recieve the gospel.

3) unity in the team
team is... interesting. so far, fabian, lorraine, jason, irene, conrad, brandon, albert, n' i have been getting a long. but it feels...a bit superficial. prayer that we will go deeper in our faith and deeper in understanding the unity that Christ calls us to as a body.

much thanks, all!

God bless :D

anticipation

MONGOLIA(and CHINA) OR BUST...

i can't wait. here goes to VSET '09.

God is crazy crazy in the ways he works. i have all of 2 minutes before i have to run off, pack and get ready for sendoff....

this is crazy, i can't believe i'm doing this now...

but God is so good through it all. STP, VSET training... all of it was heartbreak and preparation for the new identity that he continues to forge within me.

And that identity is Christ.

so i ask you all (who follow this... rofl) to pray for us as we're leaving and prepare our hearts.

prayer for:
1) our team. led by Conrad n' Irene. Prayer that our leaders will be kept strong through it all. no discouragement(i.e. protection from the enemy) but boldness in challenging us to grow more

2) the munchkins that we have yet to meet. may their hearts be ready to accept the planting/watering of the Gospel message. that good news will really be good news to both them and us

3) finally, for me personally. that I may never hinder God's work and that my trust and hope relies in him (Ps. 42:11). NO DOWNCAST SOUL...

STP (ending)

good grief. i can't believe it's over... and i distrust my heart all the more...

but it was a good time... still praying about some stuff. God asked me to consider a possibility...



staffing next year? (please pray)

STP (day 1)

i love UCLA's campus. and its people...

God's still reworking my concepts of others, especially when i EV. i sense a moment coming up where he's going to challenge me again with trusting him above all else. but even now, in my "heading towards broken" state, he's able to use me. humbled and awed at his graciousness.


.....


loving also that the other girls at STP are also really real. like, some of us have admitted to pretty shady pasts.

and that totally comforts me because i'm not alone. i'm gonna have an awesome time.

jealousy in check

when i see you touch her, smile at her, my heart burns. because i know she has her eyes set on you.

in that moment where there is the two of you, i do not matter. the world does not matter. for you only have eyes for each other before God. is this a union set by Him? i do not know. i cannot hope to pray for it to be or not to be.

for if it is, my heart shall be broken. and if it is not, then theirs shall be broken.

so who has the Lord prepared for me? is it you? is it him? or is it someone i have not met yet.

i will not hope in man; for man is fallible whereas God is infallible. Christ, my beloved, passion and purity toe a thin line between sanctioned and sin.

My Lord, how am i to fathom your jealousy for my heart? and in the same, how do i fathom your patience in love to wait for me to reciprocate?